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Chokers 2.0

Chokers 2.0

Chokers 2.0 by stylesircuit 

It is undeniable that chokers have been the “it” accessory as of late. I know it, you know it, your mom knows it, which is why she’s finally stopped telling you you look like a dog on a leash whenever you leave the house. However, as much i try to disregard ridiculous fashion rules, i have to say that my love for chokers have been an unrequited one as they do nothing for my chubby jawline. I hate to be that person who says that certain trends are only for certain people with the appropriate body type, face shape, skin tone etc,. But at the same time, i can’t wear a choker and look at my selfies, mirrors and other reflective surfaces and lie to myself that my neck is still there when it’s clearly done a vanishing act! On a normal person, they’d probably cut your neck length in half. On me, chokers just cut off my neck. Period.

But first, let’s talk about the choker trend as a whole. Personally, i’m really embracing it because i sincerely feel like chokers can really transform a look. And i know that is the most cliched phrase that a fashion writer can use but think about it:

  • Basic chiffon button-up blouse: boring, bland, matronly, unimaginative, so-wholesome-i-can’t-even.
  • Basic button-up blouse with a thick, silk choker: edgy and retro-esque af.

Exhibit A: Emily Ratajkowski

But recently, i’ve started to notice that the trend has moved into daintier regions which happen to be a little more merciful to neck lengths than its precursors. I’m talking about tie chokers, the bolo tie’s chic cousin from the city. It’s basically just a long piece of thin string, preferably made out of suede-ish material that you can get at the craft store, that you loop around your neck a few times before tying it into a knot or a bow. Like legit, that’s all there is to it.

But I’ve always personally really liked the idea of tying silk ribbons, string, a skinny scarf around the neck as a makeshift choker. In fact, i never even thought of it as a DIY because it just made complete sense to me. But then i saw a friend the other day wearing a ribbon choker which looked something like this. But when she turned around i realized that it was an actual choker that she’d bought from a store with a clasp and everything. I’m not being a cheapskate or anything but you can literally buy an entire roll of it from the craft store for four dollars. Amiright?

I first got the idea when i was bingeing on Fashion Citizen’s vlogs (don’t you just love those girls! Such a spearminty breath of fresh air in a sea of cunty clickbaits) and i noticed that Melissa had a different choker on almost everyday. It turns out that they were just pieces of strings and ribbons that she tied around her neck according to her outfit of the day. But what i noticed even more were her understated chokers of suede “cordage” that she took to looping around her neck. Here’s her DIY video on it (skip directly to 13:28 for the tutorial and 18:22 to see how good she looks with it):

Isn’t she adorable! I’m such a fan of the choker trend that i always have one in my bag with me at all times, just in case i need to get turnt at a moment’s notice. Shut up.

And sure, there’s always the fear that someone is going to get itchy fingers and think of your ribbon/tie choker as an invitation to choke the shit out of you via the ready made noose around your neck. But all in the name of fashion, amiright? …

That’s all for now! xx

Fallon artificial jewellery
$315 – neimanmarcus.com

Fallon red jewelry
barneys.com

Fallon jewelry
$63 – saksfifthavenue.com

Michael Kors tie belt
marissacollections.com

The year is 2016 and these are your basics: A Personal Review

The year is 2016 and these are your basics

It is 2016 and your basic outfit consists of a khaki green bomber jacket (satin, preferably, for that added lux factor), recycled tattoo chokers (added points if you’re still using the same one from fifteen years ago) and a pair of Adidas Superstars (no brownie points if they’re the same pair from 1995 cause ew). There’s no question about it– the casual chav look is so out, it’s in. And speaking of what’s hot, don’t mind the chilliness of your décolletage because if you’re wearing an off-shoulder top, you’re so “lit” the heat might just swallow you whole.

Personally, i wouldn’t say that i’m a sucker for fast fashion trends because…that’s not exactly a compliment to myself. Eventhough yeah i totally am a heaux for trends tbh.

Exhibit A: I have a septum piercing which i got pierced mid-last year. Hurt like a bitch, but you know what hurts more? When someone tells you they admire your bravery and that they love your piercing and you have to tell them that you’re a liar, a fraud and your name is Poussey because it’s just a clip-on. Yeah. Tell me what pain is now. **Gold star if you got that OITNB reference!

Exhibit B: I have bought more than one brown lipstick in the span of the past 10 months. I didn’t actually realize how far the trend would go, i only knew that lipstick shades were getting more and more muted so in December, i bought a basic creme Revlon lipstick in the shade “Fleshtone” which looks exactly how you’d expect it to. Then i got ahead of myself, misjudged the trend and bought an orange metallic lipstick. Yeah. Wow. S’okay guys, i made a wrong call, u-turned and i’m on the right path again. It’s all good now. But then liquid lipsticks got HEATED. UP. So i reinventoried on Lime Crime’s Shroom and Taurus from ColourPop and earlier this year, you couldn’t tell me apart from all the “earthy grunge” wannabe basic bitches if you tried 🙂

Exhibit C: I don’t own “the” pair of sunglasses from Dior but i did get a similar pair from a cranky, stingy old man in Hong Kong who almost wept when i tried to haggle the price down. As if i don’t suck at bargaining as it is. But the point is, it’s silver, it’s reflective, it’s flat and it looks like a pair of Aviators on speed.

Exhibit D: I own three pairs of chokers. A tattoo one, a black velvet one and one covered in black daisies. I have also stepped out of the house with a ribbon, an elastic silk hairband, a scarf and a flat rope tied around my neck on several different occasions. So yes, you could say that i’m very invested in this aspect of the trend.

Exhibit E: I own more than 2 pairs of ripped jeans that i destressed myself. The thing about ripped jeans is that they only get better in time. You can try and youtube it and be all neat about the incisions and the placement of the scissors but it’s only a matter of time before you wake up an hour late for a meeting and groggily jam your leg into the wrong hole while also brushing your teeth. Before you know it, you’re essentially wearing denim shorts with specially attached denim cuffs at your ankles.

Exhibit F: My best friend gave me a Jeffree Star Skin Frost highlighter (shade: “Ice Cold”) for my birthday. Not that i wasn’t already disguising my cheeks as disco balls before that because I totally already was. But i feel like this has just cemented my position as a total highlight freak, which just so happens to also be a major trend this year.

Exhibit G: I own two off-shoulder tops that i rarely wear anymore because i wore it so much when i first got it that i legit feel i need to chill the fvck out for a while, so we’re taking a break indefinitely.

As for the rest, as if i haven’t convinced everyone that i’m a total commoner/peasant for fast fashion, i almost almost bought a pair of Adidas Superstars on my trip to HK but i ran out of money and my boyfriend wouldn’t buy it for me because he’d already bought me a pair of white sneakers the day before. Lol. (Trust me, i tried, there was a lot of “But this one has black stripes on it!” “Pleaaase, i want it so badly, IT’LL COMPLETE ME!” “Eugh i hate you, you just don’t want me to be fashionable!” “You’re ruining my life!”, foot stamping, tears…the works).

I also own a pink silk bomber jacket! But i don’t wear it anymore because i literally cannot move my arms in it, like, i’d have to drink and suck my food through a long bendy straw the entire day if i tried to. Not that that’s such a bad thing, now that i think of it. There are worse things out there that people do in the name of fashion right?

Anyway, TL;DR: I’m kind of a basic bitch.

If this were a quiz, my results would be: Has never tried a Pumpkin Spice Latte but would undoubtedly be a fan of it upon first sip.

xx

SS


Bomber jacket
$43 – yoins.com

Adidas shoes
tradesy.com

Cz jewelry
hottopic.com

Jeffree Star face powder
morphebrushes.com

Lime Crime lipstick
limecrime.com